When did rugby league lose its marbles ... I mean, really lose the plot?
It happened about 9pm last Thursday, when Michael Ennis' whingeing on the run to the referee became a disturbing blight on the game – and Sam Burgess' ugly leg twist during the same match barely rated a mention. And, while we've got you, Ennis' crusher tackle on Issac Luke.
You can still hear the howls of complaints about the Bulldogs captain and his battle with referee Gerard Sutton. And his face-slapping of opponents. And the Golden Globe-worthy performance when Luke brushed his face with his boot.
Ennis the Menace. Ennis the Grub. Ennis, the bloke who once forced Nathan Hindmarsh – the nicest man in the game – to throw the first punch.
Asked on Big Sports Breakfast on Monday morning if he was a "serial pest or just deeply misunderstood", Ennis laughed, then replied: "I'll go with the latter."
Far more colourful adjectives popped up on Friday morning on the same show in the aftermath of Ennis' antics at ANZ Stadium the previous evening.
Talkback and the SMS line lit up with language that cannot be repeated on air, let alone in a clean-cut family newspaper and website, such as the The Sydney Morning Herald.
Some proffered that Ennis and his ilk were the sole reason for declining crowd numbers and TV ratings.
Then came this left hook from former player Mario Fenech: "He's probably on the same page as Benny."
"Benny" as in Mario's old on-field sparring partner, the Tigers and NSW rake Benny Elias, who according to league folklore once bit his own hand in a scrum and then complained to the refs that Fenech had done it.
Fenech went further, claiming some of Ennis' niggle was "more damaging to the image of the game than anything else".
Right on cue, the NRL went on the PR offensive.
To his credit, head of football Todd Greenberg didn't blame Ennis as much as Sutton for putting up with the verbal barrage.
"Players and referees are at fault," Greenberg said.
The message wasn't particularly loud enough for some players and referees.
Eels fullback Jarryd Hayne went at the whistleblowers for most of his side's shock defeat to Newcastle. Storm captain Cameron Smith was at it again during the loss to the Roosters. Jamie Soward was at his cranky best for Penrith against Manly.
Surprisingly, though, Manly skipper Jamie Lyon must have received the memo from head office.
He's as good as Ennis when it comes to slowing down the momentum of a game to a flatline by using the age-old tactic of holding a three-day summit with the referee in the middle of the match.
Some say it's mere coincidence that Des Hasler once coached Lyon at Manly, and now coaches Ennis at the Bulldogs. Others aren't so kind.
The avalanche of condemnation for Ennis is startling for those of us with long memories.
What of the battles between Wally Lewis and Mick Stone during Origins? The running battles so many NSW players had with the "Grasshopper", Barry Gomersall? If the likes of Lewis and Mark Geyer ever went toe to toe again, pushing referee David Manson out of the way, do you have faith that a modern-day referee could handle it?
One of the most satisfying moments in rugby league history came the night Bill Harrigan marched Geoff Toovey – the angry, angry little player and not the angry, angry coach – during a match against the Broncos.
Whatever happened to the sin bin as a deterrent?
Ben Cummins can incorrectly sin-bin Broncos forward Matt Gillett for being offside, but Sutton can't tell Ennis, "Mate, you talk to me like I am a schoolkid again, and you'll be sitting on the sidelines for 10 minutes. How does that sound, tough guy?"
Sutton took umbrage at Ennis' call of "bullshit" when his side had conceded a penalty.
Rugby league has been built on a foundation of bullshit since Dally Messenger took up all of the Roosters salary cap in 1908. It's about how much you can get away with, without anyone noticing, to gain an advantage. Walking off the mark, being inside the 10m, a sneaky hand to push the ball out.
Some will call it cheating; others know the con job has been happening for more than a hundred years. It's called gamesmanship.
Of course, it usually depends who you are supporting at the time.
Elias was the grubbiest, dirtiest dog of a player when he wore a Tigers jumper. When he was wearing the sky blue or green and gold or playing against Manly, he was my hero. A rough diamond. A loveable rogue.
As for the concern from Greenberg last Friday, and Mario's claim that Ennis is hurting the image of the game, they must be watching a different a code to me. So, too, the match review committee.
It mystifies that Ennis' tackle on Luke did not receive a charge. Yet the most disturbing image from the Bulldogs-Souths match came in a tackle involving Bulldogs big man Tony Williams.
It didn't happen when Souths halfback Adam Reynolds drove his shoulder into the back, although players have been suspended for less effective "prowlers".
The ugliest part of that tackle was happening down below.
That's where Burgess was reefing Williams' leg backwards, twisting his ankle sideways, in a wrestling move that certainly hurt Williams and was lucky not to do serious damage.
Don't blame big Sam; blame those who teach him and others across the game to do it.
What's worse: a player with a broken ankle from a wrestling move or Ennis trying to slow play down with some niggle and a whinge to the referee?
I would've thought the former, but then again some of us lost the plot years ago.
