What's doing with that weird Channel Nine apology to Cameron Smith on Wednesday night? As you know, out of a clear blue sky – and after a year long boycott – the Kangaroo captain suddenly appeared on The Footy Show beside Fatty Vautin whereupon Vautin read out, with some discomfort, a prepared statement.
"Before we get started," Fatty said, "we know it's been a difficult relationship between Channel Nine and yourself over the past 12 months. With regards to those issues, on behalf of the Nine Network we want to apologise to you and your family and ..."
And, as had clearly been choreographed, after Smith accepted the apology, they got on with the show, with seeming general relief all round that that unpleasantness was behind them, all good friends and jolly good company.
Sorry, WHAT?
Could someone, starting with Channel Nine, explain what exactly they are apologising for? I know, last year, the lead 60 Minutes reporter Liz Hayes – a dear friend, I disclose – did a big story on the fate of Newcastle Knight, Alex McKinnon, who was left in a wheelchair for life after a tackle by a Melbourne Storm player.
A small part of the story that gathered a lot of attention was the hurt McKinnon felt at the seeming lack of concern displayed by Smith – a hurt McKinnon documented at length in his book – which centred on Smith arguing the toss over Melbourne being penalised for the tackle, and telling the ref that McKinnon ducking his head made him in part responsible for the injury he sustained.
At that stage, true, it was not clear that McKinnon would be a quadriplegic, but as he was carefully carried off on a stretcher, there was no doubt that it was desperately serious. All of that was displayed fact. We saw the footage. We heard the words. There was nothing in that for Nine to apologise for.
None of the basic facts of the story are in dispute, even by Smith who, though a great ambassador for rugby league and a very good man, appears to have made a bad error of judgement on this occasion. It happens.
We're still no closer to finding out what Nine was sorry for. Was it then, the fact that Sixty Minutes didn't give Smith a chance to tell his side of the story? Well, SAY that! Tell us that was the reason for the apology. I am frankly not sure what Smith could say which would exculpate the footage we saw.
It spoke for itself. But the upshot was extremely troubling. By making such an apology, Nine cut Liz Hayes off at the knees – staggeringly, she was not even told an apology for her story was coming.
I'm o/s but for the record I was not aware of a planned apology. I'd love to speak to Cam Smith - always did. I still have plenty to ask— liz hayes (@thelizhayes) May 26, 2016
The clear implication of the apology, for McKinnon, was that he had no right to the hurt he felt. Don't argue – you can't have it both ways.
Last year, Nine was solidly backing McKinnon's hurt. With that apology, they are no longer at his shoulder, but instead lined up right beside Smith, as the cameras roll and the ratings rise once more. Smith's boycott against appearing on Nine has clearly been singularly effective.
Yet Smith made no such boycotts of News Ltd, even though they ran – as they had every right to do – the excerpts from McKinnon's book where he made exactly the same case. News was not asked to apologise for publishing it.
At the end of it all, we are left with McKinnon in his wheelchair, seemingly just last year's feel-bad-feel-good story, while the Australian captain, this year, has emerged as the real victim of the piece, with everyone feeling good that his name has been cleared!
It is a farce. I get commercial television. My wife is a Channel Nine employee. But I just don't get this.
Can't stand the pricks, get off the hedgehog
Despite it all, and all the evidence that just keeps mounting, I keep getting this feeling that somewhere deep inside Nick Kyrgios there is a good bloke, just trying to get out against overwhelming odds. (I do not feel the same for Tomic, and have long ago given up.) It's just that Kyrgios so obviously lacks that person or people you and I had at the same age, who gripped us by the shoulders, looked us in the eye, curled their mouth around to our ears and yelled, "Stop being a DICK!" Very well, in their absence, I hope you won't mind, Nick – and I don't care if you do – if I affirm the above. Stop being a dick, mate, as beyond everything else it is tedious, and yelling at a ball-boy this week was completely outrageous. But this week's true tip is on your dealings with the press. In the words of the Scottish Rugby Union president to the Wallabies in 1988: "Always remember in your dealings with the press boys, it's like making love to a hedgehog. At the end of the day, you're just one pr-ck against a thousand." Particularly amusing was your assertion that the likes of your humble correspondent are judging you unfairly.
"I can't really worry about it too much": Nick Kyrgios. Photo: Getty Images
"Sometimes," you said, "these publications write opinion pieces on me and they have never met me or watched my full match or even spoken to me. I can't really worry about it too much because it's out of my control."
Really? You live off those perceptions Nick. When you endorse products, do you want them bought only by people who've met you and watched you, or by everyone? Same gig, mate. You and your managers seek to make a fortune by putting your "brand" on products and selling them to millions of people who've never broken bread with you, never sat courtside. You can't ask for that on the one hand, and say it's not fair, not fair, NOT FAIR that others, like me, write comments critical of you, despite never meeting you. Lift your game.
THEY SAID
Nick Kyrgios: "There is zero chance that Nick Kyrgios will be playing tennis when he's 30 years old."
Mixed metaphor by Michael Hooper: "We saw the wet weather as a really good chance to pressure the Crusaders, put them on the back foot .... and us get the upper hand."
Great headline in The Australian as Aussie Sam Groth was drawn to play Rafael Nadal in the first round: "French Open: Groth draws Cassius of clay, Nadal."
Chris Gayle at it again to a female journalist: "A very, very big bat, the biggest in the wooooorld .... You think you could lift it? You'd need two hands." ZZZZZ.
Gayle: "Ian Chappell, calling for me to be banned worldwide ... Ian Chappell, how can you ban the Universe Boss? You'd have to ban cricket itself." Told yers.
Soaring: The West Indies have prospered in the World Twenty20, despite a controversial lead up with pay disputes and off-field issues. Photo: Getty Images
Eddie Jones on taking on Australia in Australia: "England have only ever won three Tests in Australia and never won in Brisbane, so it's a great opportunity for us to create new history."
Paddy Payne, a jockey himself, on his famous sister, Michelle, who had a bad fall this week: "I think she should look at retirement. What's the point in chancing it? She's won a Melbourne Cup – that could never be taken away from her – and it might be time to get married and have a few kids and just take a break."
Ian Roberts on how going to NIDA turned his life around: "I was basically illiterate until I went to NIDA. I learnt to read and write when I was 37 years old through NIDA, through phonetics. It was like I was living the whole world in black and white and the whole world became colourful."
Parramatta club captain Tim Mannah on teammate Cory Norman being charged by police with carrying MDMA capsules – whatever they are – into Star City Casino: "It's not an ideal situation to be in as a club, but it is what it is, and we have to make sure we deal with it the best we can, and focus on what we can do as a playing group."
This month's Hopoate alleged atrocity headline: "John Hopoate charged with assaulting employee at Crows Nest supermarket." I've had to put another man on to keep track of them all.
TEAM OF THE WEEK
Cronulla. On top of the NRL Ladder, as flying pigs are seen by the moonlight off Maroubra, and Harold Holt is reported staggering ashore at La Perouse and heading their way.
Manchester United. Won the FA Cup but unlike Sir Alex Ferguson, victory wasn't enough for Louis Van Gaal to keep his job.
GWS. In equal second spot and it's a shock to no-one.
Damien Keogh. Has completely transformed the fortunes of the Sharks since taking over as chair, when they were an absolute basket case.
Chris Galvin. The vice-president of Old Ignatians Rugby Football Club scored his first try on Australian soil of his long rugby career breaking a 16-year-drought against Oatley 2nd XV on Saturday. Why, yes, he IS a front-rower! How did you guess?
The Australian Women's Sevens rugby team. If they win in Clermont-Ferrand this weekend, they will claim Australia's first-ever World Series title. Go you good things, and then, on to Rio!
Michelle Payne. Had such a bad fall on Monday it required abdominal surgery and she had to watch her Melbourne Cup-winning ride in hospital on her phone to remember that she had done it.
Men's Eight. Australia won't be represented in one of the blue riband/ribbon events of the games.
Russia's Olympic Committee. Announced this week that – knock me ova wiv a fevva – 14 of its athletes at the 2008 Beijing Olympics tested positive in new tests on samples given during the Games.
Michael Diamond. No names, no pack drill. But I told yers.
Twitter: @Peter Fitz
