Surveying the list of celebrities now imprisoned in a South African campsite, Julia Morris notices a theme.
"There are lots of alpha males and alpha females," she says. "I don't want to sound cynical, but it's almost as if the producers were casting for fireworks."
On Sunday night, nine famous (or hoping-to-become famous) people were dropped into the set of Channel Ten's prime time reality show, I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!
Over the next several weeks, they will live outdoors, subsist on tiny portions of food, and share a stinky pit toilet. Viewers will decide who's evicted, who wins - and who will be forced to eat maggots or put their head in a box of live spiders.
Here's who's in the jungle - including the clues producers have been teasing us with:
CLUE: A world-famous tennis star; they will be at breaking point before they know it.
Bernard Tomic. Photo: AAP
CELEBRITY: Bernard Tomic, the hot-headed Aussie sportsman.
"I've said so many things in so many press conferences that cause problems," Tomic tells Fairfax Media. "There's been incidents with police and arrests in Miami. Obviously, I did these things and I regret them. Now I'm keen to show people a different side to my personality."
CLUE: A pop sensation, known only known by their first name.
CELEBRITY: Tiffany Darwish - known to most of us simply as Tiffany, the '80s pop sensation who reached No. 1 with I Think We're Alone Now and Could've Been.
"It's annoying when people go, 'I didn't know you could actually sing.' Because my early music was heavily produced, people assume my voice was also heavily produced. I'm very thankful for I Think We're Alone Now; I wouldn't change being a teen pop idol but I've spent a lifetime showing people I can sing."
CLUE: An iconic Australian actor who is ready for a tree change.
Kerry Armstrong. Photo: Daniel Pockett
CELEBRITY: SeaChange star Kerry Armstrong, an acclaimed actor with several prestigious awards to her name.
"For a girl that wanted to be Katherine Hepburn, this is certainly a turn in the wrong direction. This feels like a third act. I can do this gracefully, or I can do it in the wildest way that I can."
CLUE: An Australian rocker with album and singles sales in excess of one million.
Shannon Noll. Photo: Supplied
CELEBRITY: Shannon Noll, runner-up on the debut season of Australian Idol.
"Things have happened that I'm truly sorry for. My family not giving up on me has been a huge thing, but you don't want to make [poor behaviour] a common occurrence. It could be the straw that breaks the camel's back; there is only so much that people can put up with."
CLUE: An AFL champion known for their hair-raising play.
CELEBRITY: Josh Gibson, who has played with the North Melbourne and Hawthorn football clubs.
Josh Gibson. Photo: Sebastian Costanzo
"I did [intense training] camps when I was playing footy. But at least I wasn't deprived of food. When you're hungry, you don't know what kind of animal you'll turn into."
CLUE: Australia's stand-up queen, with a lot to talk about.
Fiona O'Loughlin. Photo: Rodger Cummins RCZ
CELEBRITY: Fiona O'Loughlin, who has survived alcoholism, a suicide attempt and carbon monoxide poisoning from a faulty gas heater, which left her in a coma. "The incident with the heater was inevitable in a way; if it wasn't the heater, it would have been something else. I was not in recovery when I needed to be. What I had become was so unbearable to me that I would escape every day. I'd say to myself, 'Okay, just for four hours you can be stoned or drunk or use whatever substance.' Alcohol was my gateway drug; I drank every day but I thought, 'I can't keep doing this to my liver.' So I moved on to other things."
CLUE: One of Australia's hottest models; this blonde bombshell is big in the US.
Simone Holtznagel.
CELEBRITY: Simone Holtznagel, best known for her appearance in the reality show Australia's Next Top Model.
"My luxury item is a hula hoop because I'm really good at it ... also, it's gold and black and leopard print, so it's fitting [for the jungle]. I've got a five pound hula hoop [specially weighted for fitness training]. The only annoying thing is it's so heavy."
CLUE: "This TV star and loveable princess knows how to keep it real."
Jackie Gillies.
CELEBRITY: Jackie Gillies, an original cast member from The Real Housewives of Melbourne.
"I know the worst of the worst things my husband [Silverchair musician Ben Gillies] has ever done. We all do dumb shit, but what makes a relationship work is never judging your partner."
CLUE: An iconic Australian comedian, married into one of Australia's most famous families.
Peter Rowsthorn
CELEBRITY: Peter Rowsthorn, star of Kath & Kim and top-rating 1980s sketch show The Comedy Company.
"If there's a job like cleaning the dunny, that no one wants to do, I'll do it. I have four kids; I've seen so much shit and vomit that I'll be fine.
That's nine celebrities - but these extra clues suggest at least four "intruders" will make their way on to our screens:
CLUE: Two Aussie icons in the middle of Australia's biggest feud.
CLUE: This loudmouth TV star is a beauty you're sure to love.
CLUE: A best-selling author who has exposed many tabloid secrets.
I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! airs Sunday to Thursday at 7.30pm on Channel Ten.
The journalist travelled to South Africa courtesy of Ten.
