Dog parks are the new dating sites.

What you do is get the dog that best sums you up (could be poodle, could be bulldog), head off to the off leash parks and check out the other dogs. It goes without saying that while one eye is on the pooch, the other is on its owner and more specifically his/her age and marital status.

And that's the trick, because while the hapless single girl may have difficulty chatting with available (and probably equally hapless) single boys, it is easier to impress via chats with furry animals. No witty repartee is required. You don't even need an excellent vocabulary, just a few one syllable noises sufficient to do the trick.

As you coo and goo over the animal's excellent coat/manners/behavior/ability not to poo everywhere, the theory is that the owner will saunter over.  At this point, you might change your banter somewhat and throw in the odd intellectual phrase or witty words, enough to make yourself, the owner and your various owners do cute and adorable things.

The conversation rapidly changes from dog to dog owner. Pleasantries are exchanged, the first being a summation of each other's dogs. Perhaps walking aforementioned dogs could be thrown in, dog attire and human attire for the smart animal. (No doubt this will improve with the next dog date).

Providing none of your dogs have run off, are sniffing one another's private parts or gone for the jugular,  there is a chance of similar attraction between the owners. Nay, it could be a match made in heaven, doggie or otherwise.  Immediately visions of dogs frolicking in green pastures attended by smiling owners with parasols and picnic blankets bloom.

Apparently, the animals are the litmus test of an impending relationship and now replace laundromats as the most likely place to find a mate (not a pet).

I base this information solely on a conversation I shared recently with a group of girls, who through quirks of fate and for mysterious reasons, are single. Whenever these girls get together, the conversation inevitably turns to their single status and desire for this to change.  It's a great moment for some great hilarity and a little wistfulness as we each ponder together the life that could be.

My guess is that a few of the girls may be looking at a few dogs in the proverbial window. 

- Linda Muller