I'VE always thought It's kind of a mismatch how we call an unfair battle a "David and Goliath" battle.
David won the battle, not Goliath, which is a fairly significant factor if you're going to use their fight as an analogy.
Still, I've been musing on the aftermath of that battle way back then.
Surely Goliath's mother would have had a few choice words to say to David.
And let's face it, she'd have been angry and she was probably huge.
I'm musing she said something like: "So you're David? I know war is war, but did you have to chop his head off?
"That's a bit fresh wouldn't you say? One minute you were a little shepherd boy who didn't want to wear armour, the next minute you're chopping people's heads off!
"I know everyone's saying you're ambitious and want to get ahead in life, but that was a bit extreme.
"And Goliath's sister is dirty with you too. She's doing his eulogy and had always planned to say that Goliath was head and shoulders above every man on earth.
"But you've certainly made that expression awkward for us now, haven't you?
"I'm worried Goliath's father, Goliath Sr, is going to take revenge on you too.
"He said to me the other day 'My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!'
"But Goliath Sr is an old man and if he fights you David he'll probably have a heart attack while you two are on the battlefield, and when you're on the battlefield is the very worst time to have a heart attack ... except for maybe during a game of charades.
"And you're getting so big now, David, they'll probably make you some kind of king!
"Yes, I think if Goliath Sr fights you it would be a David and Goliath battle ... only Goliath would be David, and David would be Goliath ... confusing."
If you look into it, the recent battle between vegans and farmers is somewhat of a David and Goliath battle.
Only perhaps we are likely to get confused as to exactly who is David and who is Goliath.
The militant vegans who recently trespassed onto the property of farmers and let out their livestock would likely claim the farmers are Goliath and they are merely little David. And yet, it is actually the other way around.
I'm not against vegans, I tried the diet myself a few years back to lose weight, and I know and love vegans.
But the militant vegans who recently stormed Australian farms have severely misread the play.
To state the obvious, farmers keep this country going.
To attack farmers is to ultimately attack our country, because if farmers suffer, we all suffer; perhaps not straight away, but eventually.
I have actually started tearing up while writing this column, as I am living in a farming region.
Farmers across the country have had to put up with drought and floods, foreign competition and a lack of government support, yet now is the time these cowardly vegans decide to attack our farmers.
When 40 vegans turn up on one farmer's property and let livestock out, every farmer on every rural property is going to feel alone and outnumbered.
The timing is significant. The vegan industry that is set to be worth $6 billion within four years has received its recent marketing push from business moguls in Silicon Valley, California.
Farmers across the country have had to put up with drought and floods, foreign competition and a lack of government support, yet now is the time these cowardly vegans decide to attack our farmers.
Chicken-free chicken, which is flying off the shelves of New Zealand's two biggest supermarkets, is to be launched in Australia by June, along with a beef-free burger.
As the vegan protesters take farm selfies showing off their carnivorous pearly whites, they are truly the latest batch of what the communists of old would call "useful idiots".
Earlier this week, it was revealed the European wasp is being found in Western Australia in record numbers.
Who will fight this battle for us? The farmers of course!
Or do the militant vegans think we should leave nature to nature?
Life is life, right?
Doesn't the wasp have as much right to live as we do?
Twitter: @fatherbrendanelee
