There are those who believe that the passage of time brings with it wisdom and serenity...that the older an individual gets the easier life becomes.
Each day I am a little older and I've been around for quite a few decades so I claim the benefit of my own limited knowledge and experience. And I'm here to say that life doesn't necessarily become easier.
My current reality is that - as in my youth - some days are diamonds and some days are stone.
The thing that makes the difference is the capacity to cope...the ability to take the cards that life deals, remain as poker-faced and controlled as possible, and stay in the game.
The Wikipedia definition? "Coping means to invest own conscious effort, to solve personal and interpersonal problems, in order to master, minimise or tolerate stress and conflict."
Coping is not a natural reaction. It's a learned response. It takes investment, effort and action. That's why some people are better at it than others.
To a greater or lesser degree we all have emotional resources to call on when it comes to dealing with the situations we encounter.
The good news is that those resources can be accumulated, bolstered, strengthened and stockpiled - nurtured and kept in reserve for when they are needed. And they will be needed. Never doubt that.
The mysteries of the coping mechanism have been studied for many years by many people. The result is that there are effective strategies available. Not every strategy will work for every individual in each and every situation. But there's something out there for everyone.
It's a matter of finding something positive and productive that is a good fit and embracing it. It's a matter of digging deep to find something that's already there. It's worth the effort.
Wellness Tip
The frenetic pace of life has eroded our capacity to be still, be quiet and savour the moment.
If we lose the ability to disconnect - if only momentarily - from our worries and frustrations then we run the risk of adding to our personal stress levels, robbing us of the enjoyment of life.
Some strategies to help re-establish balance could include:
- Paying deliberate and conscious attention to those things that give personal pleasure and enjoyment.
- Take a walk. Leave the phone behind. Open yourself to the sights, sounds and smells that you encounter.
- Listen to your favourite music. Close your eyes. Let the music into your head and your heart.
- Sit outside in the evening. Simply breathe and "be'' and open yourself to your surroundings.
Whatever you do allow yourself to become completely absorbed in the experience.
You control the moment. Make the time count, make it personal and make it real.
